by KrisE:
It’s a real medical condition, I swear! It all starts when K-Drama characters purchase their cell phones. Their phones always start off so cool. In fact usually everyone in the drama has the same phone; total coincidence of course. (It’s really not; it’s just product placement and sponsorship Har! Har!) One of the most infamous cell phones was from the drama “Personal Taste” starring Lee Min Ho. The phone used at that time was the Lollipop 2 by LG. How do I know this you ask? Besides the fact I know everything, it’s like the cutest freakin phone on the planet! It came in a variety of pastel colors and the front had this digital light show that made different shapes like hearts and smiley faces.  I wanted that phone so bad I called up every cell phone carrier out there! That phone was so MINT that YG family BIG BANG and 2NE1 did the promos for it! It’s only available in South Korea and the American version sucks. No it really does so my bubble was totally stabbed to death *lip curl’s like SHINee’s Key.*
So where was I? Yes, after it’s been established that all characters in a drama have a cell phone that’s when their mental health begins to decline. Of course everything starts off fine. Typical cell phone usage; you know exchanging digits, texting, voicemails, calls etc. But then suddenly it happens! All hell breaks loose, someone gets kidnapped, someone collapses because they missed one day of food and got a nose bleed! They need to contact that person riiight nowwwww!!!! But they can’t because of the sudden onset of “K-Drama Hand-Ah-Pone Amnesia”!! O.M.G! It’s as if they never even heard of a cell phone even though it’s right in their hand as they run and scream for the other person who has just gotten in a taxi heading to South Koreas center of the universe INCHEON AIRPORT!!! I knowwww and you knowwww they could have just stood in one spot and called that person but this is a sickness!
Now what kind of person would I be if I didn’t tell you all what kind of symptoms to look out for? Before they completely forget how to use their hand-ah-pone they will actually struggle with the reality of actually communicating with it. The symptoms are as follows:
  1. The extremely loud vibration of the hand-ah-pone is no longer heard or felt even if it is sitting right next to them.
  2. Resisting the urge to answer the hand-ah-pone by staring at its screen, squeezing it tightly and giving an “I’m so hurt and torn” facial expression that may be confused for sudden constipation.
  3. Its ringing has become so hard to deal with that the person will not just simply turn off their hand-ah-pone, but instead will literally take the battery out.
  4. The final symptom before full blown Hand-Ah-Pone Amnesia is the “I’m so frustrated that I like you but can’t date you because of random insignificant people in my business *cough, “Me Too! Flower”, cough* make it too difficult that I have to hurl my hand-ah-pone to the ground and release either AISH! Or AIGOO!” symptom.

Now if you are, or you know someone who might be dealing with any these symptoms call 1-800-FINAL EPISODE for support.

K-Kisses!

KrisE

Read more from KrisE here, and follow her on @K_Kisses_KrisE!